It Was The Worst Of Times, It Was The Best Of Times

We had an inauguration party tonight. I bought a big bottle of tequila and made margaritas, for all the girls and mamacitas. Whereas my guys were scattered, attended conferences, strewn across the globe.

We took care of kids and babies. We exchanged the foods we made. We ate, we drank, we hugged each other and agreed: today was a damned good day.

(Formerly) Ludlum Elementary Is In The Tank

Barack Obama doesn't have to wait until he's retired, has Alzheimer's, or even takes the Presidential Oath to get something large named for him. I'd take this over an aircraft carrier any day:

A New York elementary school has been re-named in honor of President-elect Barack Obama. Ludlum Elementary School in Long Island's Hempstead Union Free School District was re-named at a board meeting Thursday, at the request of numerous school students.

"Just to watch these kids after the board voted on what they asked them to do, they were so elated," school district superintendent Dr. Joseph Laria told ABC News. "You want to talk about "Yes we can!"? That was a lesson in democracy."

Effective immediately, Ludlum will now be known as Barack Obama Elementary School, following a decision by the board to adopt the resolution drafted by students and staff.

Picture Of The Day

Mary Beth Goring gets a pat on the shoulder from another voter as she is overcome with emotion while voting at the Beauty Market hair supply shop in Inglewood, California. Goring said she never thought the day would come where she could vote for a black president and she became more emotional than she thought she would while placing her vote. (Danny Moloshok/Reuters)

Barack Obama Is Trying To Kill Me

Why is Obama trying to give everyone infarctions?

He not only chose Grant Park in Chicago as the venue for his election night party, he announced it two whole weeks ago. It's a ginormous field with only enough trees to hide, say, a company or so of white-robed Klan members who've had plenty of time to get lickered up and load their dingy old vans with lethal weapons. Just look at those trees--I mean, gee-zus!

He's going to give a speech with lights shining on him, and everyone else is going to be in the dark. Saints and rabbis preserve us.

Geezer-Dingbat Election Update

Hey, while we wait these last 11 days and 10 nights until the election, there's a really fun interactive website called "Palin As President" where you can click on little pop-ups with Sarah sitting behind her desk in the Oval Office, bein' all Prezzah-den-shul.

In other news, David Plouffe, the Obama campaign manager (and the guy who always had the most accurate delegate count during the fight for the Democratic nomination) blurted this out today:

On a conference call that reminds me a bit of those calls David Plouffe would hold in the primary to insist (accurately, it turns out) that Obama had already won, Obama aides told reporters that their position is "extremely strong."

Which translates to, "we are stomping ass." In North Carolina, for example, early voting is running Democrat-56%, Republican-27%, Independent-17.

Obama Hits Stretch Run, McCain Wheezes

The Obama Campaign raked in over $150 million in September, adding 650,000 new donors. Average donation amount was $80. The election's outcome is so obvious that, in keeping with the finely honed bureaucratic instincts of a 4-star general, uber-careerist Colin Powell gave his endorsement yesterday, slamming his old friend John McCain and his choice for VP on Meet The Press. Why his endorsement is important may rankle Karma, but its effect is immediate amongst the Council on Foreign Relations crowd. 14 days and 14 nights to go, and the airwaves will be flooded with Democratic ads. They're having difficulty finding open spots for more placements.

McCain is all but conceding. CNN is quoting McCain advisers saying they believe that Colorado, Iowa, and New Mexico are gone to the strong Obama ground game. They've conceded those states, and the RNC has started to pull back funding in prep for the 2010 elections. The advisors claim their plan for electoral victory requires McCain winning Pennsylvania, plus Nevada, Virginia, Florida, North Carolina, Missouri, and Ohio, but they're trailing in all those polls, while even Georgia has tightened to within 2 points. (Pollster, RCP)

For a sense of the Obama Campaign's take on their chances in Pennsylvania, they have no plans to visit for the duration. They've gone up +10% there.

The Master Debate: McWTF??

Haldol side effects include blurred vision, dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, and grabbing people's asses.

This wasn't Photoshopped. Or more accurately, the entire Republican campaign is a Photoshop effort, and this image slipped past them somehow. It happened when McCain couldn't figure out how to greet Bob the Moderator.

Half a dozen friends came by and watched the contretemps, erupting in roars of laughter every 10 minutes or so. Lowest moment of the night #1: "Joe the Plumber" was mentioned 26 times, and we didn't have a drinking game ready for it. Lowest moment of the night #2: McCain was seated at the same table with Obama and Bob, just a lunge away from a head-butt and ear-biting, but the Haldol kept him in check. Best moment of the night, hands-down: when referring to running mate Sarah Palin, McCain said, "she's a breast of freth air."

Temper Mental

John McCain runs on hate, you can't read much about him before coming to the simple conclusion. Bottom line, it's miraculous he has not publicly exploded of late. With almost a full month to go until the election and his campaign doing a credible imitation of the stock market, however, there's still hope. Brave New Films, the folks who brought you the acclaimed documentary "Walmart: The High Cost of Low Price," has assembled some people willing to go on the record about witnessing his rage episodes. They're worse than suspected. In the video, a credible witness claims he back-handed a female POW-MIA advocate named Jeanette Jenkins so hard she spun around and hit the wall. They show a copy of her subsequent complaint to the Senate Ethics Committee.

The Master Debate

Apres debate, the audience of "carefully screened Undecideds" flocks around a Democrat, looking like they just found home.

Apart from the twist-o-meter battle going across the bottom of the screen and a few McCain patronizing gaffes and bad jokes, last night's "town hall debate" was predictably repetitive and obnoxious. My big take-away was that every time Obama said anything about Afghanistan, al-Qaeda, Osama bin Laden, Iran or hunting down the third-world $5 per diem mercenaries of Pakistan, a.k.a. "the Taliban," he flat-lined on both uncommitted men and women twist-o-meter focus groups. Barack should probably cut that shit out; most Americans don't care anymore, nor believe Gulbuddin Hekmatyar will go undercover in Santa Monica, take a few surfing lessons and blow up L.A. with a longboard.

Obama topped the graph out when he talked about energy being his first priority, and I was hoping to hear the phrase "Green Deal" out of him. But no. Mostly it was like watching a rigged fight, with Obama winning on points, all the while feeling he could rip McCain's arm off and beat him to death with it like whenever on political, factual, and personal bases, just boringly choosing not to. And maybe that's how the knob-twisters wanted it, since they disapproved of almost every criticism made by one candidate of the other.

While the debate might have been a yawn, the aftermath was anything but, starting off with McCain's refusal to shake Obama's hand. The C-Span cameras stayed for as long as there was a candidate in the room. After the debate, McCain and Cindy stuck around for only 1 minute, trailing a "let's get the hell out of here" aura as they left. Obama and Michelle stayed for half an hour, clearly enjoyed themselves, and didn't leave until they had engaged with every individual in the whole town hall crowd. A summary:

00:00:13 — Cindy McCain walks out to greet her husband, and follows him awkwardly around the room for 25 seconds, until 00:00:39, when McCain finally acknowledges her presence with a quick, one-armed hug and a split-second glance at the side of her head.

00:01:19 — McCain may have patted Obama’s back here. Impossible to tell what exactly he is doing with his left arm. But if it was a pat on the back, however patronizing, it somewhat negates the handshake snub. Somewhat. But not really.

00:01:20 — The snub. Obama reaches out to shake McCain’s hand. McCain makes a weird face and points to Cindy McCain. Nonplussed, Obama smiles and takes her hand, says some pleasantries, and returns to the voters in the audience.

00:01:34 — McCain glances at Cindy, nods towards the exit door, and gives a spastic little bug-eyed wave goodbye to … the exit door he’s approaching?

00:01:35 — That’s it, the McCains are gone.

00:01:36 — Tom Brokaw is in the room, talking to the audience members. Barack and Michelle Obama are in the room, talking to the audience members. It’s almost as if there was an agreed-upon protocol — you know, basic manners.
00:01:36 through 00:11:11 — For the next 10 minutes, Barack and Michelle talk to people, pose for pictures, make jokes, have apparently serious conversations with people, sign autographs, shake hands, and otherwise engage with literally everybody in the room, a hundred people or more.

At 00:05:06, a woman slips under Barack’s arm and hugs him. He hugs her back, and she actually dances back to her seat, which makes a bunch of people laugh.

At 00:09:26, Barack starts talking to (we think!) the guy who asked the first question of the debate, the one about everybody losing all their retirement savings in the economic collapse. And he keeps talking to him, and keeps talking to him, and listening to him, for more than a minute.

At 00:10:42, a black guy in glasses and a gray sportscoat asks to have his picture taken with Obama, who motions up to the seats just out of view of the camera, and seems to say he was headed up there, but he’ll come back. At 00:11:15, he comes back to the guy and happily poses for the picture.

And that’s where this C-SPAN clip ends. The live video feed last night went on for another twenty minutes, because that’s how long the Obamas stayed in the little theater, working the room, their “body language” betraying no exhaustion or wish to get out of there and have a beer and relax. Which I was already doing for them until I found out that, Oh Cripes, there's another one of these damned things to go through between now and Halloween.

Fear Of A Black Reagan

Town hall debate coming up tonight at 6PM Hollywood Standard Time. The rules will be standard Media Wrestling Federation non-tag team format, with 3-second fall and 10-minute time limits, and jumping off the top rope is allowed. This picture will have to do until I think of something constructive to say.

Bruce Springsteen Gives Voter Registration Concert in Philadelphia

Seems the Boss called up the Obama campaign and asked to help out. Some young staffer probably said, "Thank you very much for your interest, Mr. Springsteen, we'll get back to you. Oh, wait--I know...you're like a famous musician, right? Maybe you could play some music!"

The legendary rocker interrupted a free seven-song acoustic set at avoter-registration rally in Philly on Saturday to threaten to break his guitar over the head of anyone who votes for John McCain. Well, not really. He did talk about equality, fairness, America, etc., and the need to register. Pretty cool thing for an American Icon to do on a Saturday afternoon.

The Mooselini Bounce Is Over

Lord Mom sent along an aggregation site of called PalinSucks.Org. I thought it would be flash videos and satire, but it's full of links to serious information dug up from far and wide on our possible Mrs. President. Anyhow, whether resulting from getting to know Sarah Palin better or from McCain's dramatic economic leadership, a bunch of new polls are out, and they indicate the battle for female and independent voters has decidedly swung in Obama's favor.

A new Time magazine poll has Obama 50-43, with a McCain collapse among women.

Obama leads McCain by 17 points with women, 55%-38%. Before the conventions, women preferred Obama by a margin of 10 points, 49%-39%. After McCain picked Palin as his running mate, the gap narrowed to a virtual tie, with Obama holding a 1-point margin, 48%-47%.

As a cross-reference, there are the Q-poll results. In Florida, women now back Obama 57-37, in Ohio Obama leads 53-39, in Pennsylvania Obama leads 58-34. (In men among those states, McCain runs from a dead heat to +5.)

Big trouble for McCain. He has the personality of a sea urchin, the body language of a low-status chimpanzee, and the credibility of a used car salesman in a clown suit. He has no room to maneuver on pro-choice, Palin was his best shot at the demographic, and after seeming to gain traction for a week or two she's spinning out. He may go more aggressive on Iraq withdrawal and give it more female-friendly packaging, which might help a little, but I don't see how he can regain decent support levels amongst women.

Further, Pew has a poll out today, Obama 49-42, an AP/Gallup national has Obama 48-41, and the CNN/OPR state polls in some battleground states are as follows:

Florida 51/47
Minn. 54/43
Nevada 51/47
Virginia 53/44
Missouri 49/48.

Getting above 50% in Florida is huge, getting above it in Nevada is downright surprising. Polls are neither terribly precise nor valid, but when they're starting to agree from multiple angles over time...

(Note: if, in an attempt to maintain your sanity, you swore off the evils of pop culture and don't recognize the picture above the title, it's a fembot from Austin Powers' "The Spy Who Shagged Me" movies.)

Going To The Candidates Debate

Laugh about it, shout about it when you've got to choose. John McCain didn't start chewing his microphone, exhibit obvious signs of Alzheimer's or remove his clothes to show the scars of his formative captivity. Those possibilities were in good part why we tuned in to Friday night's debate, but we're dealing with the disappointment.

There was a new real-time "audience reaction" graph for Republicans, Democrats, and Independents which crawled across the bottom of the screen, so we got to see the instant-gratification reaction of focus groups to what Obama and McCain said. Focus group members were given a dial to twist up or down depending on how they felt. In general, attacking the opponent was met with their disapproval, although Obama's highest twist came when recalling McCain's mistaken early support for the war in Iraq.

In a Fox News focus group of independents evenly split amongst Bush-Kerry voters in 2004, they gave the debate to Obama 61-39. They also think Obama won every individual segment. In the partisan focus groups, Republicans gave the debate to McCain 90-10, Democrats to Obama 93-7. You could see how ragged and indecisive the graph line was for the Independents was at many points, versus the steady sine waves of the declared. Obama gained ground, sure, but McCain won points for showing up and appearing coherent after saying he wasn't going because the fate of the country is too important, and made a case for being our bipartisan shibboleth.

Psyche's News Roundup

It's coming at the Pugs fast and furious this week:

A new Quinnipiac has Obama up by 4.

Bush canceled two GOP fundraisers in Alabama and Florida to meet with economic advisers today.

McCain has not spoken to the press corps that follows him in five weeks, or invited national reporters onto his bus in more than two months.

There are now not one but two firmly drawn curtains separating Mr. McCain’s spacious quarters on his plane from the press corps.

(AP) 7 US soldiers die in Iraq in a Chinook crash.

(AP) The Iraqi parliament is deadlocked on the elections law.

(BBC) Maliki questions the future of the US-Iraq SoFA saying there are "serious and dangerous obstacles" to such a deal ever taking place.

(IntNews) The new head of the UN general assembly slams "acts of aggression" in Iraq and Afghanistan.

McCain unintentionally declares Spain an enemy of America to the Spanish press. (TPM 1, 2, 3)

NBC Nightly News (video) tears apart the Palin lies.

ABCNews (video) tears McCain apart over his flip flop on AIG.

Newsweek blasts McCain over "the fundamentals of our economy are strong."

The AP's Glenn Johnson hits McCain with an extremely harsh lede blasting him on his insider/outsider claims.

At the UAW plant in Grand Rapids with Palin, the crowd chanted "Sarah, Sarah." They "haven't once screamed for McCain, even after Palin introduced him."

(All via MikeVotes at Born at the Crest.)

The New Narrative: Ready to Lie

Few things change an election narrative like a banking system failure. Sure, wars are great for a good crisis, too, but you can only start so many of them before, ah, before your banking system fails.

Last week, when Palin went up in the polls, lots of people (such as me) were having Gore-Kerry flashbacks, and Lord Wife noted that Obama explicitly kept hammering home two election points: economy and inequity. With the failures of AIG, Merrill Lynch, and Lehman brothers coming over the weekend, she speculates he was "banking" on some upcoming news. Whether or no, both Lord Wife and Obama are looking pretty damned smart this week.

The campaign followed the bad economic news with their own August fund-raising figures, which they'd held back on reporting:

(Reuters) Obama raises $66 million (a record) with 500,000 new donors.

Slavering media coverage of Palin/McCain as a phenom began to curdle, and what the punditry just recently described as their 'misstatements,' 'possible inaccuracies,' and 'attacks' are now being openly called 'Lies:'

Rove offers a "hook" for all the lies coverage by commenting on FoxNews?

(AFP) McCain, Palin defiant in 'lies' storm

A collection of some of the "lies" editorials.

Now conservatives are starting to pummel McPain in print:

David Brooks, conservative columnist, questions Sarah Palin's readiness.

Richard Cohen, rabid stump-chewing Zionist, calls McCain a liar.

Carly Fiorina, McCain economic advisor: "Palin couldn't run a corporation, neither could McCain."

The McCain campaign's responses are as funny as cries for help:

McCain states on CNN, "The fundamentals of our economy are strong."

Douglas Holtz-Eakin, domestic policy advisor, holds up his Blackberry to a reporter and claims, "He did this. You're looking at a miracle John McCain helped create."

Me: "By the way, you may not have heard this yet, but John was once a PRISONER OF WAR."

To put a cherry on top, what has long been begged for is now being done: they're slugging McCain in the throat. Obama is directly assaulting the Character Brand in spots called "Honor" and "Ready to Lie: An American Hero's Fall from Grace." Two months to go, but these should be effective for now.

OK, So Maybe Obama Won't Win Georgia

This is the probably best signage I've seen yet out of the McCain campaign, brilliantly themed as grass-roots folk art. It's in Florida, but they filmed "In the Heat of the Night" in Georgia or Mississippi or someplace with swamps, so I'm going for the Virgil Tibbs angle. It's in a town called "Barefoot Bay." From the actual news story, here's what the man displaying the new McCain slogan has to say:

Lacasse put the sign in his front yard four days ago. ‘If I see anybody touching that sign, I got a club sitting right over there,’ Lacasse said.

The next lawn sign for McCain supporters will read: "Obama Half-Breed Muslin Lawyer."

Reasons To Feel Good About the Republican Convention

I managed to catch a few of the speeches by various luminaries before last night's "Moose Head Barbie" climax, and here are a few summaries:

Rudy 9iu11ani: "If you don't elect McCain, I'll blow up Florida."

Mike Huckabee: "For freeing Arkansas from its Russian occupation, I heart John McCain."

Some Party Woman Speaking at 5:50 PM: "I...can. Read!"

The Moose Head herself was pretty impressive. Well-written, well-delivered, telegenic, roughly 25% of Sarah Palin's content was Nobama criticism, 25% hostile fabrication, 25% standard anti-government ravings, and 25% "Proud to Be A Murkin." In other words, formulaic. But for the remarkable addition of a vagina, the speech could've been written for anyone from Barry Goldwater to Steven Colbert. Listening to the Party responsible for $20 trillion in bad bonds warn against tax increases was a trifle much, of course, with the irony lost on the angry, angry crowd. A crowd which expressed its Homo Loquens sentiments as follows: "Boo. Booo! Yay. Yaay! Boooo. USA! USA! USA!"

(Aside: If a Republican wanders in here for some reason and has stuck with it this far, congratulations, and I have a question: what do you have to be angry about? Your party has been in power, has usurped more power, has exercised more power over our liberties, our finances, our allies, and our so-called enemies for the past 8 years than any other period in US history, and you're still angry. There is good news for you, a soothing Gilead's balm guaranteed to finally make you happy. Calm down for a minute, go look in a mirror, and repeat these words: "I f**ked up." Say them often, and you will start feeling better in no time.)

Speaking of feeling better, despite Sarah Palin's well-received litany of scandals, lies and deceits, the revitalized, high-energy Pugfest masks a deep rift in Republican philosophies, one which reaches deep down between McCain and the Fundie Panderers running his own campaign. Even Palin seemed to think some of the vitriol she was about to read off the prompter was going too far, acid sure to have back-splashed once the various women's focus groups which were running collate their data. The Rovian speech could be interpreted as taking a folksy Moose Head brand and transforming it into Cutthroat Opportunist.

You might call the core rift a battle between the Roots and the Shoots, a desire to deal with a plethora of contrary, dangerous details by shoe-horning them back into a narrative past. This isn't a Republican impulse--it's ancient, it's tribal, and is still the most commonly observed behavior in organizations which are in deep trouble. When facing a confusing, hostile environment, the collective decision is usually to go back to what used to work best, and try to do it harder and better. That's why (Karl Rove protege) Steve Schmidt the campaign manager who lobbied so hard for Palin, is actually trying to hide McCain as much as possible. Consider, for but one example, that Oldfinger's convention address tonight is scheduled to exactly coincide with the Giants-Redskins game which kicks off the NFL season. Palin's speech drew an audience close to 20 million. McCain won't draw 10.

The problem with the "dance with them that brung ya" behavior is that the greater the levels of confusion and danger, the less likely it will work, and sharper wits in the Republican Party realize this. In a golden media moment of illustrating that point, the feed to a microphone was left on during Chuck Todd's MSNBC show yesterday. Mike Murphy, John McCain's closest former advisor, and conservative columnist Peggy Noonan, the right's Intellectual Ballerina, talked freely amongst themselves. Contrary to their public line-toeing, they completely trashed the strategy of picking Sarah Palin. I assume you've already heard or read Noonan's damnations of, "It's over," and "The most qualified? No! I think they went for this -- excuse me-- political bullshit about narratives --" The full transcript is worth reading, and it's proof of intelligent Republicans speaking honestly.

While Palin was in some ways a brilliant choice for VP, the Republican Party is playing a bad hand with yesteryear's calculator. They're scared and confused. America needs heroes, they know that, but they're offering icons treadworn and false. The other side offers Vince Lombardi, innovation, and an exercise regimen. I see the appeal in the former, I see it in the whole country "bottoming" so hard as to remove all denials, dignities, and doubts in the hard collisions that would happen under McCain/Palin. Or, as it might well turn out, under a President Palin.

President Palin. Catastroika. No decorum or restraint whatsoever would remain in what has already been the greatest corporate orgy since the Gilded Age. The tent villages of homeless in my city would swell into towns, the line outside the soup kitchen that's there every morning when I drop my son off to his $1,000 per month Day Care would stretch around the street corner, down the block, pensions and Social Security checks would be worthless, and the angry youths I see walking through our neighborhood from their alternative high school would start unleashing what they're barely managing to contain.

The other side offers coaches who know how to coax out the best competencies, even from the alien corporate-socialist substrate upon which patriots, governments and consumers must currently float like reviled stains of dirt. The coaches are the only feasible hope we've got left for climbing up into coherencies. Deep down, I think, even Sarah Palin and the Fundies might know that.

Sarah Palin's News Roundup

Believe it or not, I've been arguing for days with various smart folk that the Republican VP choice on McCain's behalf was brilliant. A gamble, sure, but a bold one which shows a real grasp of the country. First off, it was far better than McCain's top picks, ending his ongoing, agonized personal debate between the Toady Party's Joe Lieberman and the Desperate Housewives show's Nicolette Sheridan. Having only met Sarah Palin once, big-on-blondes McCain didn't remember her name and after repeated promptings, got impatient and said, "Whatever! Hey, I'm just the candidate--if Karl Rove says I'll run with a flock of flamingos, what choice do I have?"

Really, though, Rove & Co. outdid themselves on this one. Ha-ha-ha, change? You want change?? Palin is a Fundie who sports an impressive resume for the 80% of America which reads nothing except free People, Us, and tabloid periodicals you find at beauty parlors, dentist offices, church foyers and oil change franchises. She is perfect for the 95% of America that thinks 'Foreign Affairs' refers to the upcoming Boris and Natasha movie starring the "Beef, It's What's for Dinner" spokesman Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson (who recently broke up with Lance Armstrong!).

Palin, a former Alaska runner-up for the Miss America Pageant who married her high-school sweetheart, has also been a sports anchor, a small-town mayor, has 5 children, is a no-rapes-barred pro-lifer, and before being governor of the Toughest State in the Union for the past two years, was Alaska's Oil and Gas Commissioner. She catches salmon, is a former secessionist, wants creationism taught in schools, shoots caribou, hunted bear as a child, she commands the Alaskan National Guard, and was once on a jet that re-fueled in Ireland. People keep telling me how these are bad things, and I reply, "Don't you get it?! This is nothing less than a breakthrough in American Politics. It's like we're primates picking at grubs and the monolith from the movie 2001 appears above us and says, 'Finally--the Trailer Park President has arrived!!'"

Seriously, check your rationality at the door, it doesn't belong inside the US ballot box. Rove & Co has their psychographic act down and the lurps are on the case. Exhibit #227 in How Not to Think About America: Steny Hoyer, US House Majority Wet Noodle, last Friday called Palin "a worse choice for VP than Dan Quayle." Precisely, Steny my shell-shocked glossolalia victim, precisely. Quayle, back in those distant, beatific days of Acadia, was famous only for his ingratiating dumbness and cheerful blondeness, and if I remember correctly, he became George Bush Senior's Vice President after they won the god-damned election together, Steny you good-for-nothing Congress-bastard! (Calm, soothing thoughts, breezes, pretty butterflies landing on flowers.) So...what kind of sick elitist allows themselves to go around being called "Steny," anyway?

Now the Republicans have an improved, supercharged version of Dan Quayle. In fact, to the evangelicals, Palin makes Dan Quayle look like Dustin Hoffman when he played 'Rainman.' As America's first VPILF, she did not disappoint, delivering her acceptance speech, "I Will Break America's Glass Ceiling With These Award-Winning Breasts" to thunderous applause while McCain (I am not kidding) approved of her nether regions. She has dominated the media play ever since, even fueling wild speculations she covered for her daughter Bristol by claiming her illegitimate Down's Syndrome baby as her own. Jesus, you just can't make this stuff up.

Yeah, she has a few scandals going and is insane in that special way that's so common among people who long for Armageddon. But she gave a speech in Texas (back in April, when she was already being considered as the VP pick) apparently with amniotic fluid leaking down her leg, then she hopped a 10-hour flight to Alaska so her commercial fisherman husband could drive her to their little home-town hospital and she could have a baby. That might have been incredibly dumb, but far more importantly it was tough. The Fundies aren't disturbed by a pregnant teenager here, a fired ex-brother-in-law there. C'mon. They identify with that shit, and they will reach for their unmaxed credit cards to give money to the McCain campaign when their preachers tell them to.

Let's face it: Sarah Palin is someone right wing evangelicals, the biggest political force in American history, can get behind. And that's not even getting into her possible resonance with women. It'll be very interesting to see how the scandals play out, but the ones on the table right now probably don't shake core appeal. (And since when have scandals prevented most Republicans from getting elected?) Presidential politics are emotional politics, and whichever way you slice it, naming a Fundie as VP reinvigorates The Base--something a McCain, a Romney, a Lieberman, a Pawlenty could never do. I predict that the next McCain announcement will be that they've raised more donations than in any month before.

(Update Shocker: The atheists who run Us magazine came out with a hard-hitting cover that's on the stands now, themed 'Babies, Lies, & Scandal.' The word you're looking for Mitt Romney, is schadenfreude. Watch for it on your next supermarket trip, with bonus reportage on other shocking teen pregnancies.)

(Update Shocker 2: The NYT is reporting his team couldn't move Oldfinger off his Lieberman Fixation until just 2 weeks ago. Infighting would explain the story's theme of incomplete vetting, making it more likely Palin hoodwinked 'em on something big. Here's hopin'!)

"The Arc of The Moral Universe Is Long, But It Bends Toward Justice"

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Hats Off To You, America!

I thought that an African-American would be nominated by his party to run for President. Just that I'd be in a retirement home eating oatmeal through a straw, and that he'd be a former CEO who talked like Thurston Howell the Third. But barring Denver's Invesco Field blowing up in the next 90 minutes (which I admit remains a slight possibility) it's going to happen. Wow! Sometimes we really are a better America. Here's what the Jane Austen of the Right, Peggy Noonan, has to say about the Democratic Convention so far:

As for Bill Clinton's speech, halfway through I thought: The Master has arrived. Crazy Bill, the red-faced Rageaholic, was somewhere else. This was Deft Political Pro Bill doing what no one had been able to do up to this point at the convention, and that is make the case for Barack Obama. He lambasted the foe, asserted Obama's growth on the trail, argued that he was the right man for the job and did that as a man who once held that job and is remembered, at least in terms of domestic policy and at least by half the country, as having done it pretty darn well. He gave his full imprimatur to a crowd that believes he has an imprimatur to give. As Clinton spoke a friend IM'd, "What is this, the Clinton convention?" The fact is, until both Clintons spoke, it was. Now oddly enough it isn't. Now eyes turn, and finally, to Obama. This was one of the great tee-ups.

The Hillary speech was the best of her career. Toward Obama she was exactly as gracious as she is capable of being. Mrs. Clinton's speeches are rarely notable for great lines but this one had a number of them. "It makes sense that George Bush and John McCain will be together next week in the Twin Cities, because these days they're awfully hard to tell apart." KAPOW. We'll be hearing more of that one. "Sisterhood of the travelling pantsuits" – funny and self aware.

She normally doesn't use the teleprompter – actually it's rare for her to use one -- but last night she did, and she proved herself the most gifted pol on the prompter in current political history. Her statement from the floor during the rollcall? Fabulous. The decision to put Obama over the top and ask for acclamation? Masterly. Mrs. Clinton's actions this week have been pivotal not only for Obama, but for her. She showed herself capable of appearing to put party first. I also believe she has come to appreciate both emotionally and intellectually The Importance of Being Teddy.

She will not be the president of the United States the next four years, but she can ease herself into the role of Teddy Kennedy-esque fighter for her issues in the Senate. And that I think is exactly where she means to go, and what she means to be. And that, for her, is a brilliant move. Really: brilliant. Here's one reason: Teddy is, throughout his party, beloved. Beloved would be something very new for Hillary.

That's from someone who despises the Clintons. And the rest.

(Update: just back from a 'babies for barack' nomination house party. Invesco field blew up, yes, but only from cheers and a beyond-capacity crowd. America has its first ever black presidential nominee, and he's someone who could've written his own ticket to anywhere on Wall Street after graduating from Harvard Law, but instead went to try and lift people up. I was on the phone with a business owner in London this morning, who said, "We were all up late last night watching the live coverage of Obama's Convention." He said Biden spoke at 2AM Greenwich Mean Time. Tell me how it's all tarnished and hollow in the morning, but tonight just tell me, "How cool is that?")