Dracula's Lament & Lyrics, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, By Jason Segel
Forgetting Sarah Marshall is a romantic comedy about a musician (Jason Segel, who also wrote the script) who has lived with a Crime Scene Investigator-style actress (Kristen Bell) for five years. Although it's about a painful break-up with lots of "uncomfortable" humor, much of the movie was set in Hawaii where we plan to go next month, and it was imbued with Moliere-level instincts for pop culture ironies. Not surprising, because the producer was Judd Apatow, of Freaks and Geeks, 40-Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, SuperBad, et al. It was great fun and we, all of us, laughed a lot.
The film's high water mark was the musician's quirky, crazy idea for a rock opera about a puppet Dracula hopelessly in love with a woman he can't have. In the movie, Segel plays "Dracula's Lament" in front of a bar full of incredulous locals for the girl who makes him soon forget Sarah Marshall, and he makes her forget a surfer-champion ex-boyfriend. It's completely perverse, not for everyone, and I loved it. Somehow, somebody already has the song up on YouTube, synched to the Sesame Street Dracula. The lyrics, in a Transylvanian accent:
It's getting kind of hard to believe
things are going to get better
I've been drowning too long to believe
that the tide's going to turn
And I've been living too hard to believe
that things are going to get easier now
I'm still trying to shake off the pain
from the lessons I've learned
And if I see van Helsing, I swear
to the Lord I will slay him!
A-ha-ha-haa! Take it from me
I swear I will let it be so! A-ha-ha-haa!!
Blood will run down his face
when he is decapitated...aah!
his head on my mantle is how
I will let this world know:
How much I love you--
die...die...die!
(Pause)
I can't.
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